And this is why they yell ‘aiyeee!’
I had my first Tai Chi / Kung Fu class today. This is part of my “2013, The Murray Has Landed!” project, which is why I spent this morning wishing I was still in bed, instead of being in a Ukrainian Community Hall performing a move that I think was called “Fondling The Pony In Slow Motion”, while my thigh muscles screamed about the retribution they would be inflicting on me tomorrow.
No, wait… the move is actually called “Parting The Wild Horse’s Mane”. I looked it up. Fondling The Pony In Slow Motion is probably a move that will only get you arrested…
I have found what looks to be a great school with a great teacher. As someone with Lupus, I have some extra challenges to work against, and over the last few weeks I have called schools and talked to the teachers and I finally found someone who seemed genuinely interested in working with me.
My impression was reinforced this morning, when the teacher (or “Sifu”, in Kung Fu terminology), asked me to explain Lupus to the other students, and we talked a bit about the pain and fatigue and the fogging out. If nothing else, it was an awesome opportunity for advocacy!
And then began the glorious pain!
I have to remind myself that I am in my forties, with zero conditioning and all sorts of interesting health problems. It’s bound to be difficult, right? Say it with me: “Murray, it’s gonna be difficult. Murray, it’s gonna make you ache. Murray, a very pleasant 18-year-old kid is gonna do a move on you where it felt like he materialized out of thin air, pulled out your liver and then pounded you repeatedly across the face with it wrapped around his fist. And then that same kid is gonna apologize afterwards and ask if the fact that you’ve gone purple in the face means anything alarming.”
I know that tomorrow I will be painfully aware of parts of me that I have forgotten that I have. I will probably post a message that just says, “Kill. Me. Now.” I will desperately want someone to do the move called “Fondling The Aching Thighs”.
For now, however, I’m pleased to be doing something that I’ve been thinking about for a long time. Yes, that’s right, Internet: it’s 2013, and the Murray has landed! Aiyeee!
Murray @ Midnight